Saturday, September 12, 2009

Most Embarrassing Moment

Last night may top the list of embarrassing moments in my life. I went to dinner with S and two male friends (whose spouses were out of town). We had a lovely dinner, and the waittress complimented us on how well-behaved we were - compared to the last time! That's what makes the following even funnier.

As we were getting up from the booth, S said his hat was on the floor. It was near the wall. I gallantly offered to retrieve it, and lay down on the bench, stretching for it. As I am short, that meant really laying down on it. Turns out the bench was NOT attached to the base but merely set upon it. I felt the bench sliding toward the floor, pushing me off and under the table....I was trying to figure out what the hell was happening, heading for the table base in slow mo...pinned between the table top and the bench! The table began to tip. People were gasping, "Is she all right?!" The crash of glasses, plates, and silverware followed, which all landed on the opposite seat.

I was extricating myself as quickly as possible - STILL HOLDING the offending hat in hand as I crawled out from between my rock and hard place. The waitress said, "We'll get that fixed right away!", no doubt envisioning the next lawsuit. I gave him his hat, and strode out the door of the restaurant, my face burning. Our little group let me know this incident would be repeated many times in legend and tale...

What's your most embarrassing moment? Can you top this one?


  1. I'll have to think on my most embarrasing moments for you - but here's something to look towards the bright side...
    1) nobody had a camera - hence no long lasting images circling the internet for you to re-live each time you check your inbox.
    2) my Dad wasn't there - that's got to be a plus. You know he'd never let you live it down.
    3) the table must have sheilded you from any liquids that were left in the offending breaking glasses - saving you money on dry cleaning bills :)
    4) You didn't have a child scream loudly - 'look mommy! The lady broke the table!'

    You know I love you :)

  2. oh and please ignore my spelling mistakes - It's been a long day :)

  3. Very good points my dear!! If Al had been there it would have been the final straw. Also lucky for me one of the owners' wives was not there, because she is the parent of a child once in my room - it wasn't even in Hood River. They only know my first name - :-) so maybe I'm safe except for my lousy rat friends who will spill the beans. Or is that water?

  4. Oh.... my poor twisted sister.... we really are related .... !!! Like Tammy said.... at least there are no pictures, and I know what you are made of .... so eventually your ego will be mended. Let's see.... my MOST embarrassing moment.... geez... there are soooo many!!! LOL
    Here is one... While delivering the paper one fine Thursday, it was a normal day.... take the papers in the store, back to the car.... on to the next stop.... etc. Each time I went into the next store my jeans kept hanging up on the little tab on the back of my tennis shoe... (so I thought) .... and I would give my leg a "little shake" while I was walking in and out. About my 6th or 7th stop along my route, I was delivering at a Tavern, had just dropped the papers off on the counter, said my "hello's" to the "good 'ol boys" at the bar, started out the door.... with the same familiar "shake" of my leg, when all of a sudden I felt something "release" from my pant leg....???? I looked back and .... you guessed 'er Chester ..... there was my UNDERWEAR!!!! Of course the good 'ole boys were watching as I spun around and grabbed them and jetted out the door, not waiting for any comments. Evidently when I put on my jeans from the day before the panties were still in the leg!!! Sure glad there are no names on this blog!!! LOL.... and, I do have many more .... "embarrassing moments R I" ! .... so hopefully, my dear twisted sister, this in some small way has helped to "mend" your moment.

  5. Oh Great.... I thought I signed up under an alias name.... so much for being anonymous!! LOL

  6. Oh hey - big deal right? I just don't want to blow anyone's comfort zone, and be a little more free to speak my mind. It's a small town where I live. Thanks for your story!! Pretty good, sista!

  7. I'm just teasing with ya sis? No big deal... and you are welcome! Love Ya!!!